It's Shattering Bit by Bit...

just because i'm tolerant in nature doesn't mean you can take advantage and act all bossy around me!

was it necessary to show that sour face of yours when i say i don't wanna bring the umbrella? If you're so concern of being drenched in the rain, well then use yours! and that eye-roll thingy you did when i say i don't own a small foldable umbrella...wtf?

and just because of some god-knows-what reasons you suddenly turned all moody and made the whole shopping trip such a frustratingly sulky experience. if something's bothering your mind why don't you just let it out of your chest rather than having me wondering what wrong i have done to make you brood like that!

and for fuck sake don't think that i didn't feel your anger when i went to the washroom on my own and didn't 'invite' you along! cmon! if you need to go then go lar! don't make faces and tell me "you know i wanted to go to the w.c. too?" hey, you could have come along you know? wtf!

no that i haven't known you well enough to tolerate those habits of yours but why does it have to be always you, you and YOU? i'm really tired of being the 'yes' man and trying to be nice just for the sake of friendship.

and the water sports thing...you really tested my patience. i'm a fool to be in such an excited mood to approach you first! did i ever complain when you say you would invite your school friends and cousins? did i say 'oh, i think i'll be lost in your group of friends just because they speak little English?' it's not like i'm not there with you, you know?! i'm so eager to do this with you and yet you just stood me off like that! weren't you the one who ask me to get more people to join? i wouldn't even thought of going to this shit if i knew from the start that you are so reluctant to go! i'm sorry but this time a word of apology simply isn't enough to remedy the lame excuse you gave.

i don't care if you're reading this but if whatever i wrote pisses you off just remember it wasn't easy for me to put up with your demanding ways at the first place! if you think this is vulgar then perhaps you should learn not pry into people's privacy to fulfill your insecurity.

To that Selfish Son of a Female Canine

am i really thaaaat bad when it comes to saying 'no'?

do i sound like i'm joking when i told you that i cannot carry the burden you plan to weigh on my shoulders?

why is it that you can easily come to accept someone else's refusal but not mine?

i mean where the fuck you got the impression that i'll agree to whatever you say?

and fuck you for having the fucking nerves to make the decision without my consent!

it's pathetically ironic when you go through all the fucking formalities, put on that fucking mask of yours and act so faking-ly polite to others.

but when it comes to me all you've shown was sheer injustice!

c'mon! be a man and for fuck sake listen to my side of the story!

it's so easy for you to say the job is manageable! you;re leaving anyway, what accountabilities do you have?

but what about me?

you claimed that there will be others who can guide and help me along the way...

oh please!

like 'hellyea' those people will come to my aid when i scream for help.

more likely i'll end up doing other people's shit instead! like how it always turn out to be...

it's so sickening when you say i can QUIT when things get too overwhelming.

FUCK!

since you have so little faith in me from the beginning why not strip my from that fucking list of yours at the first place?

and fuck whatever confidence you have in me because i know i cannot do it!

i know my own limits and i have a fucking valid reason to reject the post.

but did you fucking care?

yup you do actually...only for yourself!

i know you've taught me many things for the past few months but that doesn't mean that i'm suitable for this task.

you've got the wrong girl pal!

the next time you fucking wanna decide on something, make sure you understand the problems others might face instead of leaving them drowning in tears for that selfish plot of yours. fuck off!